ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Randomize
