i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Buhtt sex?
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Houston, we have a squirter
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
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