Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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