What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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