I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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