Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I want to fling myself into the sun
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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