You made me cry and you don't even care
This girl is more easily done than said...
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
i think i have two assholes
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Randomize
