Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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