i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
