were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
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