just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
