I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
Randomize
