Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
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