No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
