I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
