batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
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