you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize