Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
and she was petting her beer can
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize