his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
