you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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