i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
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