Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
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