is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
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