You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
