you guys were way drunker than both of me
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
We had to coat check the pizza.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
