The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize