You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
