Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
