How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
