I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
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