i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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