Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
