My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
