Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
