i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
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