did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
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