she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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