I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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