I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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