I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
false alarm. still invincible.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
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