If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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