How'd it feel making her break her religion?
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
and she was petting her beer can
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize
