I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
