I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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