She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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