Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
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