before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Randomize
