My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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