I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
