I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
